the feeling of failure

Have you ever felt that no matter what you do it will never turn out right?
You may give things a first, a second and a third try but you will never successful.
I have.
It seems that no matter how much I pray, work or try I will never get things right.
I'm being punished every single day. My life has been nothing but a struggle all this years.
I am so tired. I don't know if I can go on like this for any longer.
I am at the point of breaking. Everything's so hopeless. No one understands.
Yes. People may say that they care and that they understand how it feels, but why do you people say that?
It doesn't make it any better. Maybe you say it to be kind, but the truth is.. it hurts even more.
Because I know that you never had to experience all the shit I have had to put up with. You know that too.
everything I have ever worked for has been crushed into pieces. I have always been pushed down to the bottom when I was at the top.  I have always been the type to raise again, and keep moving. I never give up.
But right now.. I'm in too deep shit. I've been working for something a whole year, been given false hope and broken promises, and now. It is over once more. I can't even cry. I feel nothing. 

Or I suppose this is the feeling of the dead.